All Mad Here
by AutumnKrystal
Summary: 'Janice, time's almost up.'-'We need to get Janice out of here'-'We need to exist'-Janice, young, radiant, childlike innocence.. And did I forget to mention suffering from dementia and psychosis?


**DISCLAIMER: READ IT!**

**I must say I was extremely inspired by the up-coming Alice Returns to Madness and American McGee's Alice. I loved the game growing up, I still play it from time to time. SO when I saw Alice returns to Madness trailer, I was hit with the plot bunny arrow. I have songs you NEED to listen to when reading this. It helps set the mood.**

_'Memory/Memory_

_**'Janice and voices talking at once'**_

**http:/ www. you tube . com / view _ play _ list? p = ED9E7DAC71195F20  
**

_ 'What's wrong Janice?' _

_'I feel as though...'_

_ '"As though," what, Janice?'_

_'As though.. I'm looking through.._

_A shattered looking glass.._

_Like.. Alice.'_

_ 'It's all right Janice.._

_ Janice are you listening?'_

_'So many pretty star's..'_

_ 'Are you all right, Janice?'_

_'Of course. A night to never forget.'_

_ 'Do it Janice. Make us proud.'_

_'What if I mess up? Will you be angry?'_

_ 'You can't mess this up Janice. And Janice.._

_ How can we be mad..?_

_ When we are apart of your mind?'_

_**Psychosis: The loss of contact with reality, a delusion of what really is. Usually including false ideas about what is taking place or who and making contact (seeing or hearing) what isn't there.**_

Ever since I was a little girl.. I saw shapes.. Heard voices.. I never told Mum, or Da, for fear they'd send me away. Sometimes they come in the form of my stuffed animals. Tell me things, starting off nice and then getting more grotesque as they go on.

* * *

At a young age I didn't know that it was wrong. That it was a sign that things would never get better.. Only **worse**.

I never suspected they would play follow the leader down the white spiraling staircase. They told me it was a game! Just a game..

I **never **meant to **hurt** anybody!

Now they say my **times** almost **up**!

The psychiatrist say's it's all in my head.

'_**It's all in your head Janice.**_

_**They don't exist.'**_

'_Then tell me, Doctor.. If they didn't __**exist**__,_

_why would I have heard them?'_

_

* * *

_

I can't remember my name sometimes.. And I hear the doctors say the feel intimidated by my stare in morning sessions.

'_I have morning sessions?'_

'_Not you, Janice._

_ Us.'_

'_Us?'_

'_**Us.'**_

* * *

Doctor Monroe gave me a copy of Lewis Carrols, _Alice in Wonderland_, he thought I could relate. The shapes tore it away that night. They did **not** like it.

'_Too childlike for __**our**__ Janice._

_ Janice.. Hmm.._

_ My dear, that sounds a lot like-'_

'_**Alice.'**_

'_Too much for my liking.'_

Apparently, Doctors don't like it when their gifts are torn to shreds. They're paid to not believe in things. To put labels.

* * *

My memory faded again today.. I couldn't remember my brother. Johnny?.. No. Lawrence?..

Dr. Monroe asked me to complete a series of puzzles. He said they were for fun, but if for fun.. Why take notes?

* * *

Sometime later, Dr. Monroe asked me to try the puzzles again. I didn't mind.

It was that day, that I heard the doctor's talking again. My **delusions** were angry. I had added another label..

_**Dementia: Loss of brain function, affecting memory, thinking, language, judgment, and behavior.**_

They raved, about how they had to get me out of here. How they **had** to **exist**! But why? Hatter, as I had taken to calling the bigger, more commanding hallucination, threatened me to not speak anymore. He pointed out how we had to plan everything accordingly.

'_After all, __**time**__ is running_

_** out**__.'_

As I slept that night, trying to ignore the voices, a memory swept in. The one time I told Da about these voices, he questioned me exclusively and trimmed me down to the last detail.

_ 'They come to you in your Dreams, Janice?'_

_'Yes, Da. They say awful things!_

_Sometimes they do it all together, so I'll have_

_To listen to all their stories at once.'_

_He smiled, calm blue eyes accepting. Hand grazing my cheek softly, as the other pulled my blanket up even more._

'_It's only a Dream Janice._

_ They can't influence you. They can't_

_ Hurt you_.'

Only a Dream he said.. They couldn't hurt me..

He **LIED**.


End file.
